Holy Habits: Discipling Kids and Teens in a Digital Age

While there are always going to be mixed views of technology no matter what decade we’re living in, the reality is that we are surrounded by it and we can choose to use it when helpful and not use it when it is unhelpful. So whether you serve in children’s ministry or youth ministry, here are a few thoughts on habits to develop with media:

Keep Media Segments Short

Aim for 2–5 minutes, followed by interaction (questions, activities, prayer) so kids and youth don’t slip into passive consumption.

Always Debrief Media

After a video, ask:

• “What did you notice?”

• “What does this teach us about God?”

• “How could you live this out this week?”

Balance Digital and Analog Experiences

For every screen-based element, try to include something hands-on: crafts, role-play, journaling, small-group discussion, serving activities.

Model Healthy Tech Boundaries

Encourage leaders not to be on their phones during service (unless using them as a deliberate part of the lesson), so kids see adults who are fully present.

Equipping Parents and Carers at Home

Kids’ spiritual lives are often shaped far more by what happens Monday–Saturday at home than by what happens in our programs. Healthy tech discipleship has to involve families. Here’s how you can support them.

Help Families See the Spiritual Impact of Tech

To help paint a clearer picture of some of the realities of spiritual impact of tech, you might share things like:

• Many adults confess they check their phone before they talk to God in the morning.
• Notifications interrupt prayer and Bible reading for the majority of believers.
• Hours spent online can quietly replace time that might have gone to conversations, family devotions, or rest.

This is not to guilt parents—but to wake us all up to how powerful and subtle digital habits are.

With this in mind, here are some practical ideas to share with parents.

1. Create “Sacred Tech-Free Times.”

Encourage families to choose simple, realistic rhythms like:

• No phones during meals.

• Devices off (or out of bedrooms) during bedtime routine and morning wake-up.

• A weekly “tech sabbath” block where the family steps away from screens to play, pray, and rest together.

2. Use Tech with Kids, Not Just Around Them

• Watch a Bible story video together, then talk about it.

• Create a family worship playlist and sing a song at bedtime or on the school run.

• Use a Bible app or verse-of-the-day tool and read it aloud as a family.

3. Teach Kids to Notice Their Hearts

Help parents ask questions like:

• “How do you feel after watching that?”

• “Did that game or video draw you closer to Jesus, or make you feel further away?”

• “What kind of posts make you feel anxious, jealous, or angry?”

4. Set Gentle, Clear Limits

Healthy boundaries are an act of love:

• Age-appropriate time limits for games and social media.

• Filters and parental controls where needed.

• Clear family rules about when and where devices live (for example, charging phones outside bedrooms at night).

5. Encourage Both Digital and Non-Digital Spiritual Practices

• Digital: audio Bibles, kids’ devotion apps, worship videos.

• Non-digital: family prayers, gratitude lists, Scripture memory, walks where everyone notices God’s creation.

Our role as ministry leaders is not to dictate every family’s rules, but to resource and encourage them to think spiritually and intentionally about their tech culture.

Teaching Kids and Youth Digital Discernment

We don’t just want to manage kids’ tech use; we want to disciple them into wisdom so they can make godly choices as they grow. Here are some suggested guardrails for kids and youth to consider as they engage online.

Digital Discernment for Kids

For Kids: Keep it simple. Help them to ask the following questions as they engage tech and media:

• “Is this helping my heart love God and others?”
• “Is this kind, true, and pure?” (Philippians 4:8 language)
• “If Jesus was sitting next to me, would I still watch/play this?”

You can build these into regular lesson moments and small-group conversations.

Digital Discernment for Preteens and Teens

For Preteens and Teens: Go a little deeper. You can explore:

• Identity:
“What does social media tell you about who you are?”
“How does that compare with what God says about you?”

• Time:
“Where does your time go online?”
“What might God be inviting you to do with some of that time instead?”

• Fruit:
“After 30 minutes on your favorite app, what’s the fruit? Peace, joy, kindness or comparison, anger, numbness?”

When technology is aligned with a clear purpose, used in community, and framed by prayer and Scripture, it becomes a powerful ally in forming young disciples. We live in a world that constantly pulls children and teens toward distraction, comparison, and endless noise. But that’s not the end of the story.

God has planted this generation in this digital age on purpose. He has given His Church creativity, wisdom, and (yes!) technology to share the Gospel in ways that are both engaging and deeply impactful.

As children’s ministry leaders and youth workers, we don’t have to fear tech, and we don’t have to worship it. Instead, we can:

• Use it thoughtfully,
• Question it honestly,
• And teach kids to love Jesus more than they love their screens.

If you’re looking for a quick framework to evaluate tech through a discipleship lens, we’ve created a free Check Your Tech leader guide to help ministry leaders evaluate when—and why—they use screens in ministry.